the_cupbearer: (modern life)
Ganymede | Benjamin Prince ([personal profile] the_cupbearer) wrote2016-12-19 10:57 pm
Entry tags:

oom: for Sinric

Ganymede opens the door for Sinric, letting him in to the quiet contained sanctuary of his room, footsteps falling silent on the stone floor.

"You are always welcome here, Sinric. Alone or with me."
thewidewideworld: (Default)

[personal profile] thewidewideworld 2016-12-20 04:04 am (UTC)(link)
Sinric removes his fur coat and his shoes, turning to kiss Ganymede's cheek. "Thank you. My own room is lovely but-" he frowns and shakes his head. "I don't know why but it doesn't feel quite right at the moment."
thewidewideworld: (middle - thoughtful)

[personal profile] thewidewideworld 2016-12-20 06:17 am (UTC)(link)
He nods, glad of the understanding. "Some things have lost all meaning, whereas others, the meaning has changed. Or I have changed."

"But it's not just that. My room is a part of Ragnar and Athelstan's rooms. The door may be on different floors but they open into each other. Things there are not as they were. Athelstan has come to prefer the solitude of his brother's rooms in the roof and in the absence of other company, Ragnar is rarely there."

He ducks his eyes. "And I find myself doubting if I belong there either."
thewidewideworld: (Default)

[personal profile] thewidewideworld 2016-12-22 09:22 am (UTC)(link)
"You think I should talk to them about it?" He steps to Ganymede, gently running a finger over his braids.
thewidewideworld: (Default)

[personal profile] thewidewideworld 2016-12-24 04:59 am (UTC)(link)
"Then that I shall do." Sinric nods, gently unbraiding Ganymede's hair and looking for a brush. "I hope they will understand."

"Did you have people go back to? After Zeus?"
thewidewideworld: (Middle - the marks I bear)

[personal profile] thewidewideworld 2016-12-24 05:17 am (UTC)(link)
"A thousand years." Sinric sighs, struck by the horror that. "How a world must change in that time. How did you-" He shakes his head. "Forgive me, I should not ask. It must be painful to think on."
thewidewideworld: (Default)

[personal profile] thewidewideworld 2016-12-24 05:27 am (UTC)(link)
"I don't want to cause you further hurt." He kisses Ganymede's neck lightly. "Please tell me if I delve tot deep."

"How did you remake yourself? In a time that must have been so unlike all you had known?"
thewidewideworld: (Default)

[personal profile] thewidewideworld 2016-12-24 05:37 am (UTC)(link)
"Where you could turn your anonymity to your advantage." He nods, seeing the reason in that. "A wanderer can be who and what he needs in accordance to the need."

And Ganymede's beauty is a coin that never fades, unlike his own.
thewidewideworld: (middle - it only hurts when I breathe)

[personal profile] thewidewideworld 2016-12-24 07:05 am (UTC)(link)
Sinric turns slightly to look at Ganymede and his eternally beautiful profile. "We were made as things of pleasure, you and I." He touches Ganymede's cheek, his own eyes filming with tears as a great wave of self pity overtakes him. "But time broke us in different ways."

He closes his eyes, covering them with his hands as he pulls away. "And the greatest hurt is the one I have done to myself."
thewidewideworld: (Middle - the marks I bear)

[personal profile] thewidewideworld 2016-12-26 02:33 am (UTC)(link)
Sinric lets him, not fighting Ganymede's touch. His words take longer to reach him, caught in the roiling maelstrom of his own fears and doubt.

He leaning in to kiss Ganymede, needy and hopeless. Because he doesn't know what else to do and this at least he understands.
thewidewideworld: (Middle - the marks I bear)

[personal profile] thewidewideworld 2016-12-26 03:26 am (UTC)(link)
Sinric breaks the kiss, dropping his eyes in shame. "Forgive me, my friend. That was... ill done of me. I had no right."
thewidewideworld: (middle - thoughtful)

[personal profile] thewidewideworld 2016-12-26 03:40 am (UTC)(link)
Sinric offers him a sad smile. "I know you do. Just as I enjoy kissing you. But as you said, we are men, not toys of pleasure. I had no right to take from you without your consent."
thewidewideworld: (Default)

[personal profile] thewidewideworld 2016-12-26 03:54 am (UTC)(link)
Sinric kisses the tips of Ganymede's fingertips, his eyes still low. "I want to be with you tonight." He lifts his eyes, "Without masks."

He cups Ganymede's cheek, brushing his hair back softly before kissing him again. Softly, warmly and with gratitude.
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[personal profile] thewidewideworld 2016-12-26 04:17 am (UTC)(link)
They are both products of the lives that shape them. Their masks are sometimes truer than the faces beneath. Faces that have become the masks over so many years.

Sinric's kisses wander down the slope of Ganymede's cheek and throat, lingering on the soft skin just behind his ear.
thewidewideworld: (naked - back)

[personal profile] thewidewideworld 2016-12-26 04:49 am (UTC)(link)
Sinric doesn't expect him to make much sound. His own sounds are often as much as show as anything else. He moves lower, kissing and licking the curve of Ganymede's throat. He knows it isn't the roughness Ganymede craves but Sinric knows he could never give that, not that way.
thewidewideworld: (Default)

[personal profile] thewidewideworld 2016-12-27 06:09 am (UTC)(link)
Sinric leans back to look Ganymede in the eyes. "I would be lying if I said I knew. I just... I want to find something, anything that feels right, feels normal." He doesn't feel right in his own skin, he's looking for something, some touchstone that feels right again.
thewidewideworld: (middle - honest)

[personal profile] thewidewideworld 2016-12-27 06:25 am (UTC)(link)
"I know. Or at least I'm trying to come to terms with that." He sighs softly and brushes Ganymede's hair back. "I suppose I hoped losing myself in shared pleasure with another might help. But perhaps we are too much alike, too swift to mould ourselves to the needs of the other."
thewidewideworld: (middle - not the best light)

[personal profile] thewidewideworld 2016-12-28 05:37 am (UTC)(link)
Sinric shakes his head, looking at Ganymede with dark eyes. "Being beautiful, being desired has been such a large part of who I am. It's the reason I was chosen for Constantine. It's why I became who I am."

He lowers his eyes. "I know I'm vain but... I'm losing that part of myself. With every change, with every scar, with every year, I lose Constantine's Aureus. The person I was. And I hate myself for how much that hurts."

He gets up, moving away from Ganymede, pacing a little. "You must think me very stupid but at least when I'm sharing pleasure, I can feel wanted again."
thewidewideworld: (middle - dark eyes)

[personal profile] thewidewideworld 2016-12-28 05:56 am (UTC)(link)
"I don't know what I'm describing half the time." Sinric lets out a bitter laugh. "I don't know what I feel or how to talk about it. I don't even know if I should or if just saying it will make things worse." He lets out a half suppressed sob. "I'm so afraid of the storm inside me. All the time."
thewidewideworld: (middle - dark eyes)

[personal profile] thewidewideworld 2016-12-28 06:16 am (UTC)(link)
"I'm afraid it's happening faster than I can understand. That I won't know the person I see in the glass." It comes out as an angry burst, sharp and harsh.

Which he at once regrets, he hugs himself as a sad truth finds it's way forward. "That the people I love won't know me."
thewidewideworld: (Default)

[personal profile] thewidewideworld 2016-12-31 05:11 am (UTC)(link)
Sinric huffs softly and nods, shaking out his hair. "I'm sorry, Ganymede. I didn't ask to come back here with you to wallow so."
thewidewideworld: (Default)

[personal profile] thewidewideworld 2017-01-01 05:05 am (UTC)(link)
"Please?" He asks softly, hoping to return to the simple pleasures he can here to share.
thewidewideworld: (Default)

[personal profile] thewidewideworld 2017-01-01 07:31 am (UTC)(link)
"I'm not even sure I would know Aureus any more." Sinric confesses, stepping to Ganymede and taking his hand. "But I'm very glad not to hide any part of myself with you. The good and the bad." He draws Ganymede into a kiss.
thewidewideworld: (middle - honest)

[personal profile] thewidewideworld 2017-01-02 02:47 am (UTC)(link)
"Truly?" He shrugs, turning his face into the touch gladly, enjoying the contact. "I think back on the innocent, frivolous child I was and wonder how I managed, knowing so little of the world."
thewidewideworld: (Default)

[personal profile] thewidewideworld 2017-01-02 03:31 am (UTC)(link)
"Is it wrong to miss that innocence? And yet, if I could talk to him now, with all I know, I would feel there was so much I would have to warn him of. To envy innocence and at the same time want to break it."