"It's not, I won't worry a fraction less than I do now, which is a considerable amount." Of course he would still worry. This didn't change that.
But he takes and lets a breath out of his nose as Ganymede got around to what the man had asked for earlier. What Raylan had promised him earlier. Normally, Raylan didn't talk about work, because it always resulted in more worry. Worry that had eaten Winona alive from the inside. Worry that he couldn't curtail no matter how much reassurance he tried to give. Ben's touch helped soothe some of the bubbling anxiety that he would cause the same kind of pain to the now older man.
"Sometimes I don't like that it's the only thing I'm good at. But then I end up savin' some one from somethin' terrible, even if it doesn't change anything for them; not really. But at least they're alive enough to hit their next struggle. I've-" He stops and tightens his lips a little as he thinks about how to say it.
"I know what it is I'm doin' and over the years, it bothers me less. Lives don't weigh the same as they used to, if it's just some criminal cockroach. I don't know what that says about it."
no subject
But he takes and lets a breath out of his nose as Ganymede got around to what the man had asked for earlier. What Raylan had promised him earlier. Normally, Raylan didn't talk about work, because it always resulted in more worry. Worry that had eaten Winona alive from the inside. Worry that he couldn't curtail no matter how much reassurance he tried to give. Ben's touch helped soothe some of the bubbling anxiety that he would cause the same kind of pain to the now older man.
"Sometimes I don't like that it's the only thing I'm good at. But then I end up savin' some one from somethin' terrible, even if it doesn't change anything for them; not really. But at least they're alive enough to hit their next struggle. I've-" He stops and tightens his lips a little as he thinks about how to say it.
"I know what it is I'm doin' and over the years, it bothers me less. Lives don't weigh the same as they used to, if it's just some criminal cockroach. I don't know what that says about it."